October is a beautiful month. It's my favorite season and the birth month of my Mama!
We're also coming up on almost two years since my Mama was diagnosed with breast cancer and about a year since she's been fully healed. It's amazing.
It's breast cancer awareness month, and while I did just learn that I'm off the hook for regularly self-examining, I wanted to take a brief moment and reflect. It was the beginning of November 2014, one month before we found out that Rowan was on the way. Kind of a knock-out, exhausting month, if I recall correctly. Thankfully, in that month, we got to visit during Thanksgiving weekend. It was lovely to see Mama in person. Made me breathe a bit easier.
I could NOT believe how painful the long wait was. You learn there's a problem. You learn that tests need to happen. Then, you find out that you have to wait for results. Then results may not be clear. This waiting was pure torture. And I wasn't the one with cancer. And this was all before we even got to any treatment. That was the ultimate waiting.
As I look back through my prayer journal, it's difficult to even recall. I clung to Jesus, the healer. Isaiah 58, "Your healing shall spring forth speedily..." It's as if it was the only thing going on for those months...
I've been reading some this month about Saint Teresa of Calcutta and have been moved by her understanding of suffering. It's something that I know nothing about, really... And when I look back on that year, I'm struck by the amount of suffering that my Mama went through... not to mention my Dad. I cannot believe what suffering it would be to watch your spouse suffer in that way for that amount of time. It's so hard to fathom.
I'd like to honor all of you who have been on that journey. I'd like to honor all of those who tirelessly and lovingly support you--day in, day out. From care packages of hats to sharing good books, long prayers and texts late at night. It's a journey, to be sure.
I know that all stories have their own twists and turns and some have much more painful endings than our family's specific story. Mama, I love you and I'm impressed by what a woman you are and have become. You're a rockstar. And yes, you now have the post-chemo curly hair to prove it!